First Responder Counseling

First responder therapy in Huntington Beach

As first responders we appreciate you!  You handle the difficulties in our society that we are not equipped to deal with and you willingly put your lives and health on the line to make our society great.  Anyone who is or has been a first responder knows that taking care of others comes at a great cost.  That cost unfortunately is paid by the first responder themselves. Seeing the things that you have seen and handling the situations that you have been asked to deal with takes a toll.  Often that toll comes out sideways for first responders because they are capable of handling the difficult situations at work,  but when they are left face to face with the aftermath, it becomes difficult to process through the hardships and psychological difficulties that the situations at work produce.

Often seeing and dealing with hurting people can lead to burnout, chronic  stress, and create difficulties in your relationships.  There is a saying in neuroscience that under stress we regress.  You may find yourself lacking in motivation, ou may find it hard to take care of yourself, drinking more than you would like, not really showing up as a parent or spouse, and altogether performing less optimally than you would like.  Often you find yourself going through the motions at work and in your personal life.  It becomes hard to connect with yourself and with those you love, everyday seems like the last and it is easy to lose hope that things will ever get better.

The reality is most people can’t relate to what you have been through as a first responder, and there aren’t great outlets to process through the difficulties you may face on a daily basis. Life can be lonely as you attempt to balance the needs of the department along with pressure from politicians and the public, all while trying to maintain a sense of normalcy in your everyday life.

First responder therapy can help you to have a place to process the difficulties that might be dragging you down. Often just having a place to let go of all the burdens that you are holding and finding a way of making sense of all that you have been through can bring a sense of comfort and relief.  First responders therapy can also help you find the words to articulate what you need and want from your spouse, as well as help them understand what is being asked of you at work, and create strategies that can help you find balance in your relationship, where both of you are getting your needs met.  

Meet Brandon Pendergraft, First Responder Therapist in Huntington Beach

My name is Brandon Pendergraft and I am a licensed marriage and family therapist in Huntington Beach, California.

I have had the privilege of working with many people in law enforcement, firefighters, paramedics and emergency medical technicians including nurses, doctors and aides. It is my pleasure to let you know that help is available. Just as you help so many people through the difficulties they face, there is help for what you are going through as well.  It would be my honor to offer you a free consultation, hear what you are dealing with and get started on finding health and balance in your life. 

My Approach to First Responder Therapy

My approach to first responder therapy is to first focus on self care.  Burnout in your job is inevitable without proper self care.  Your job demands too much from you to neglect yourself. Most people who have been on the job for any length of time have met the grumpy, chronically injured, and indifferent peer, and nobody wants to become that.  

We will also focus on learning how to check in with yourself and recognize the signs of when you are under stress. Together we can work on being able to identify what you are feeling, and bring your nervous system down from a state of fight or flight to a state of rest and digest.  I help first responders identify their needs, as well as strategize ways to get those needs met on the job and at home. 

 Obviously you are tough, and that is why you do your job, so quite likely by the time you read this some of the symptoms have started to come out sideways and are boiling over.  We can address those issues and help you get them under control as quickly as possible.

First Responder Therapy FAQs

What is the best type of therapy for first responders?

First responders often need therapy that is capable of handling the rigors and difficulties that are inherent in your job, which means you need someone who can hear the hard things and not be overwhelmed themselves.  First responders need someone who can deal with the trauma that you have faced and help get you to the other side.  Unfortunately, addiction and relational stress are the most common stressors that first responders face.  In order to do your job there is often a level of detachment that accompanies facing the difficult situations you do in your job.  This detachment helps you at work but can be difficult in your personal lives. Therapy that focuses on getting a handle on your internal experience and finding ways of articulating that is the most helpful way to avoid sinking down into your vices and pretending that detachment is an adequate solution.  First responders need to find a therapist that they feel comfortable with, which is probably more important than the type of therapy the therapist provides.  

What are the mental health needs of first responders?

As mentioned above, some of the key mental health needs of first responders are: Identifying their needs and finding ways to letting others in on their personal experience, processing the difficulties in their job, often addiction issues to handle the stress, difficulties in their personal/marital relationships as there is a lot of time away from their spouses, and keeping a routine and schedule with so much time on and off the job.  Depression, loneliness, feeling trapped because of retirement, fears and anxieties associated with the job are also mental health issues that are listed as chief reasons for seeking therapy for first responders.

How do first responders deal with trauma?

Trauma for first responders is often so specific  to the different job that you perform as a first responder.  One of the first things to remember with trauma as a first responder is that you will have a delayed response. Often in the moment you won’t have the time nor ability to focus on your experience in going through the trauma because you are concerned with eliminating the threat or danger first. The trauma tends to come out afterwards and often it doesn’t even seem related to anything that is currently happening.  Once you recognize the signs of trauma showing up, you can begin to take steps to eliminate the effects of the trauma.  Lastly it is important that you find ways of processing the trauma in order to make meaning of the trauma and discuss what changes need to be made as a result of the trauma in order to protect you as you move forward in carrying out your job duties. 

What does PTSD look like in first responders?

PTSD or Post Traumatic Stress Disorder is a condition that develops by experiencing, knowing, or hearing about a major stressor or trauma in your life. First responders often have stories where they faced an event that was particularly traumatic.  Upon hearing many of these stories over the years, it is easy to see how one may be adversely affected by how painful and traumatic these difficult events are to overcome.  

First responders may not have gone through the traumatic event themselves but just hearing of others going through horrific experiences can lead them to experience PTSD.  Some of these stories can leave one with unnecessary and overwhelming fears and anxieties associated with experiences they haven’t even encountered themselves, e.g. a fellow first responders is killed in an incident where you were on scene. These incidents leave a mark and can certainly cause PTSD.

For some first responders, the tendency is to isolate, move inward, become reflective and ruminate on the issues, turning them over and over in their minds.  For others their tendency is to move towards alcohol and numbing agents.  It can be common to miss days at work or choose to avoid situations that may potentially involve danger as much as possible.  Nightmares or recurrent dreams can be common. Memories of that incident can replay intrusively. The great news is that PTSD is treatable and you can expect a full recovery.  We cannot erase the memories but we can help to determine what those memories tap into for you as well as how we can find peace and eliminate the fears and anxieties.  PTSD is quite manageable and treatable fortunately.